I'm not myself, myself at all

For those who can't understand a bloody word, I'll translate this later for you. Meanwhile, I'll keep on using this language that I've been using since I got here, the fucking English (yes, with Capital Letter). I have to live with it, breathe it, smell it, speak in it, listen to it, dream in it (yes, I dream in English but I don't think I have incorporated it at all, as Mrs. Rib or Hello People used to say) Everything I do, I do it in English. Everything I hear or I read, is English. The radio, the tele, newspapers, magazines, signs on the road. EVERYTHING! Now, I can imagine how you feel while you're reading this or what you're thinking: What the hell!!!? What the fuck is she talking about? I can't understand a fucking word! (excuse my mouth, or in this case, my hands) I'm doing this just for you people imagine how could this be for yourselves. Imagine yourselves as foreigners, southamericans, spanish-speakers, living surrounded by kiwis speaking their closed English everywhere. Can you imagine that? A nightmare! But, is not that terrible. Everybody is welcome here. Everybody who wants to do hard farm work. Everybody who wants to get paid after ten and a half hours of real hard, boring work. Welcome to the first world! Your dreams will come true here!
Sorry, what was I talking about?